I wanted to head to the beach to film this live recording of my new song 'Did I Miss It'. Yes, I know it's a funny
but it was a very cold and windy day on the coast.
I hope this song might resonate with some of you. For me it's about a lot of different things, but it's mostly about holding myself back and grieving the loss of my dad. I feel like I never really got to say goodbye and it still feels like I've been constantly waiting for this moment of an actual goodbye to hit me, but almost two years on, I still am searching for it. I sometimes feel guilty for moving on with my life, but I don't want grief to hold me back. I've written quite a few songs in honour of my dad, exploring the feelings that come with the expectation of grief during prolonged end of life care and the aftermath of losing a loved one. Music will always be a place where I feel most comfortable sharing my feelings, and I will forever be grateful. I have learnt to smile and laugh through this period of my life but I miss and love him every day.
As always, a massive thank you to the beautiful friends who helped me put this song and video together.
Stream 'Did I Miss It'
Written by me and Eg White
Produced by Eg White
Directed, Shot & Edited by Charlie Thornton
Assisted by Tyrone Powell
Produced by Pastl
Recorded by Tim Baxter
Styled by Joanna Femi - Ola
Single Artwork by Jan Juhaniak
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Album 'Bundle of Tantrums':
Album 'Another Bundle of Tantrums':
EP 'Under The Willow Tree':
EP 'Adore':
EP 'Wonderland':
EP ' Colour'
Lyrics:
When I was a young girl
I would sit by swimming pools
Just trying to drown
All the noise in my head
Oh since back then
It's the voice that’s held me down
A world of worries
About the wrong things
Make a punch bag of myself
you’re young, you focus
On the darkness
then you miss the one farewell
Did I miss it
You think it’s fine
There’s so much time till there isn’t
Did I miss it
You can’t go back
You can’t go back
Just to visit
Did I miss it
Underneath the tall tree
What a difference
That a sing
le day can make
real clear now I see
house is burning
But there’s nothing to take
An empty chair
Unanswered prayer
Smoking there
Now all I do is wait
And I heard you got a haircut
Did I miss it
You think it’s fine
There’s so much time till there isn’t
Did I miss it
You can’t go back
You can’t go back
Just to visit
Did I miss it
Smallest goodbye
I hardly noticed
Turn off the light and then you turn away
Did I miss it
You think it’s fine
There’s all this time, but there isn’t
Did I miss it
You can’t go back
You can’t go back
Just to visit
I’ll keep living,
Always be,
There with me when I listen